When should you start covering up around your kids?
This question recently came up in one of my "Mommy Groups" on Facebook. And its a good question. People have their own viewpoints on nudity and whats appropriate vs not appropriate and here is my take. I think its totally fine to be nude around your kids, up until a certain age. They have been exposed to this mom body since day one. I mean lets be honest, both kids came out my who-ha and were immediately attached to the boob, so being naked never really "weirded" me out LOL.
I also come from a very "open" family. It was nothing to see my grandma, or mom, or aunt "guns ablaze" walking around the house. It was their house and if they wanted to walk around naked, they could" would typically be the response I would get when I would question why I was being subjected to such "openess". It didn't bother me though. I wasn't traumatized. AND I grew up in a house full of women, so we all had the same materials. No big deal. It was kind of 'my norm'.
When I got married, I was having this conversation with my husband about how open we were, so nonchalantly, and he thought it was so strange. I guess when you throw testosterone in the mix, it can get a little hairy (no pun intended). At the time we had a young daughter and she had clearly seen me naked. It was nearly impossible to shower without dragging her in the bathroom with me. So for peace of mind, and convenience it just worked. Hubby on the other hand, wouldn't let as much as a chest hair be visible around her. LOL And I understood. She's a young girl and I agreed she didn't need to be exposed to a male body, even if it was her father. I think I was more so avoiding having to explain the "differences" between the male and female body parts. But with us having two children now, a boy and a girl, its no avoiding it. The first time I changed our son at home, she was standing right next to the changing table and asked "Mommie what's that"? I just told her. Oh thats your brother's penis. He has a penis. You have a vagina. Thats what makes him a boy, and you a girl. Her response "oh ok!". LOL
Dreux still has never, and will never, see Daddie in his birthday suit though. Call me crazy, but I personally don't think its appropriate for a young girl to see her father naked. My preference. However, Dreux does still shower with me from time to time. Why? Because its convenient! It's quicker, AND as her mother I can assist her properly with cleansing her body. She still prefers her bubble baths, but showering with Mommie doesn't make her uncomfortable. How do I know? I asked! I think children will indicate, be-it verbally or physically, that they are uncomfortable. She's five so she's at the age now where she doesn't want "boys" to see her naked, and that includes Daddie and her little brother from time to time (as if he knows what the hell he's looking at anyway lol). We give her privacy as she runs to the room screaming "don't look I'm naked". LOL But then there are days she twirls that lil ashy booty around for giggles.
Consequently though, we've asked ourselves, how do we handle the boy? Is it ok to dress and undress infant of him? Will he shower with Mommie? Does he shower with Daddie? If so, up until what age? Do we bathe the kids together? Again, at what age do we stop? It's not like they are super close in age (4years apart) so I'm not too sure an 8 year old girl and 4 year old boy should bathe together. Right? All questions that need answers. For now, they do bathe together, RARELY because its a complete circus. DJ thinks splashing his sister (and mother for that matter) in the face is fun, and Dreux yells "stop touching your penis DJ" every five seconds. (Disclaimer: DJ is only 11months and he 'found' his toy that goes everywhere with him, and attempts to detach it........*rolls eyes* BOYS) Hubby has already said that once DJ gets of a certain age, me changing in front of him will have to stop. What boy wants to see their mother nakied anyway? (Clearly right now he could care less, though he's recently found a fascination with putting his hands down my shirt and he hasn't brestfeed is over 5months...manish little boy lol). Again...BOYS! No one warned me!
I digress. Long story short, I don't think there is anything wrong with bathing with your same-sex children when they are young for convenient purposes. Our lives are complicated enough. And dressing and undressing doesn't bother me much either IF the child seems comfortable. I am not, however, for fathers and young daughter seeing one another in the nude. I may or may not shower with DJ when he's a little older either. Have no clue, but I'm not opposed to it. I will say though, he won't be five hoping in the shower with me how Dreux does now.
My advice: Do what works for your family. Have age appropriate conversations about body parts. Give them privacy and cover up if it makes you and your kids a little uncomfortable. Teach them to love and respect their bodies as well as other people's. I think adults have a bad tendency of over sexualizing everything! Boobs are baby feeders and vaginas are gateways to life LOL Get over yourselves. :)